Solipsism: (from the Latin ipse = "self" and solus = "alone"). The philosophy confining reality to oneself and one's experiences.

I posted about my possible craziness on a forum to get some responses from people across the planet. Forums are interesting that way - you can bear your soul to a million people, but there's no emotional investment in it, so it's not like you have to worry about trust or confidentiality or anything of that sort.

I started the forum thread with the exact same thing I posted here. The responses I received were mostly meaningless, but somebody posted this:

I think it's a "butterfly effect" sort of mentality, where everything's connected and there's a bit of solipsism thrown in on top.

That pretty much describes me. I'm not exactly sure what to do with that information, but it feels accurate. I can't shake the feeling that things are connected (when they aren't), and I can't shake the feeling that I'm the vehicle behind the connections.